My first time in the Bikram Yoga studio was on the day after Christmas. Although technically at the end of 2014, I consider this experience the first of my Forty One-Derful things, because I have continued to attend classes on an almost daily basis (unheard of for me!). Not since my foray into Roller Derby have I followed any sort of regimented exercise program. In truth, I haven't skated regularly since 2010--which tells you how long I have lived a predominately sedentary lifestyle. Not surprisingly, this period of time coincides with (and is the result of) the break up of my marriage and depression, but I digress.
If you are unfamiliar with the practice of Bikram Yoga, it is a series of 26 specific movies and 2 breathing exercises performed in 100 degree heat over the course of 90 minutes. There are many yoga acolytes who frown upon the practice of Bikram Yoga, calling it the commercialization of yoga (just as Tae-Bo allegedly was to kickboxing. Incidentally, I used to enjoy Tae-Bo until my knees protested.). I was scared to death to try it. I mean, seriously, 100 degree heat?! How can that possibly be good for me?!
What I've found is that the heat doesn't bother me as much as I'd thought it would. Yeah, it's difficult, but hey, I used to live in the tropics. It's not unlike that. After all, when it's hot (and humid!), I move, I sweat. Currently, however, I have the coolness of winter to help with over-heating once the class is over. I am not sure how well I will like Bikram Yoga when it is hot outside too. Time will tell, I guess. Either way, if just surviving the heat is the most difficult thing I have to do all day, that knowledge itself brings a sense of accomplishment.
Actually, and perhaps surprisingly, the most difficult aspect of Bikram Yoga for me is the breathing and meditation. I have taken only one other yoga class (not in the heat), and it was the same. Remembering to breathe through the moves, to focus on stillness, to clear my mind, these are what challenge me the most. I am not known for sitting still. Even in repose my brain is always in overdrive. The more classes I take, however, I find that the regimented moves (and the semi-scripted instruction of the class leaders) help me to release control. I don't have to think as much about what I am doing (although of course I do). While the class instructors encourage listening to one's body and only doing what the individual can physically do (even if that means taking a small break to breathe through the discomfort), I can also just strive for improvement, opening myself up to the experience. Curiously, I especially love the scheduled relaxation moments during the practice.
As with anything, though, there are good and bad days. One unfocused thought about anything other than the Yoga can cause me angst and agitation. Anything from how I really want a pedicure (Not that anyone cares, but I figure if I have to stare at my feet for the better part of 90 minutes, they should look pretty) to what I am wearing (there are mirrors everywhere!) to the best placement of my mat (Heaven forbid I am by the vent blowing more hot air) to what I have to accomplish later that day (Grocery shopping, work, housecleaning...)...all of these can derail my breathing. This in turn can lead to frustration, panic and/or lightheadedness.
I also have to work especially hard to not berate myself for being unable to do a pose fully. When I mentioned this to one of the instructors (who I jokingly call "Pretzel Boy" for his amazing flexibility), he told me, "Your body took a long time to get to this point. It will take a while to open it back up. Be kind to yourself!"
This, it seems, is just one of the general practices and ideas behind Yoga. Just being kind to yourself can really go a long way. While I am definitely NOT one of those Yogis who place their mats right up next to the mirror so they can stare at themselves perfecting each pose (too easily distracted by what I am wearing, remember), I feel like I better understand the importance of that kindness--and of physical self-awareness.
Because of the heat and stresses of this exercise program, I have to be diligent about listening to my body (both during and after class). I am not always great at this, choosing instead to ignore physical ailments as I force myself to make it through the day. Part of listening to myself also includes figuring out what is a realistic Bikram Yoga schedule for me. Three to four days on, one day off? Every other day? I already know that by day six in the heat (which I actually tried), I really need to take a day off to recuperate. I must also carefully monitor my water intake every day.
There are some days when I occasionally find myself in an almost manic state either during or after the class. This usually allows me to accomplish a lot throughout the day, but it also means I tend to do better with earlier classes (yes, even at 5:30am). While the early hour is indeed a challenge, there is something really extraordinary about stepping outside into the cool air after the class, the steam rising from my body. I already feel gratified by the exertion, but to see the moon low on the horizon while the sun rises on the mountains...It feels special somehow. Like a gift for taking time to work on myself.
And I am finding I do look forward to spending that time by myself. Who knew it'd be while exercising? I love my daughter, but she can be a lot of pre-pubescent angst and energy. It's hard to deal with her sometimes. I am really hoping that by learning to calm myself during class through measured (and/or deep and cleansing) breaths, it will also help me to be a better mother.
After all, as one of the instructors (a very sexy, rock star type) told me, "You don't have to force or push anything. By practicing yoga, everything will just fall into place, even in other aspects of your life."
Oh, I hope that is true.
Well, here's to positive thinking and positive being. Until my next entry, Lovelies....
As with anything, though, there are good and bad days. One unfocused thought about anything other than the Yoga can cause me angst and agitation. Anything from how I really want a pedicure (Not that anyone cares, but I figure if I have to stare at my feet for the better part of 90 minutes, they should look pretty) to what I am wearing (there are mirrors everywhere!) to the best placement of my mat (Heaven forbid I am by the vent blowing more hot air) to what I have to accomplish later that day (Grocery shopping, work, housecleaning...)...all of these can derail my breathing. This in turn can lead to frustration, panic and/or lightheadedness.
I also have to work especially hard to not berate myself for being unable to do a pose fully. When I mentioned this to one of the instructors (who I jokingly call "Pretzel Boy" for his amazing flexibility), he told me, "Your body took a long time to get to this point. It will take a while to open it back up. Be kind to yourself!"
This, it seems, is just one of the general practices and ideas behind Yoga. Just being kind to yourself can really go a long way. While I am definitely NOT one of those Yogis who place their mats right up next to the mirror so they can stare at themselves perfecting each pose (too easily distracted by what I am wearing, remember), I feel like I better understand the importance of that kindness--and of physical self-awareness.
Because of the heat and stresses of this exercise program, I have to be diligent about listening to my body (both during and after class). I am not always great at this, choosing instead to ignore physical ailments as I force myself to make it through the day. Part of listening to myself also includes figuring out what is a realistic Bikram Yoga schedule for me. Three to four days on, one day off? Every other day? I already know that by day six in the heat (which I actually tried), I really need to take a day off to recuperate. I must also carefully monitor my water intake every day.
There are some days when I occasionally find myself in an almost manic state either during or after the class. This usually allows me to accomplish a lot throughout the day, but it also means I tend to do better with earlier classes (yes, even at 5:30am). While the early hour is indeed a challenge, there is something really extraordinary about stepping outside into the cool air after the class, the steam rising from my body. I already feel gratified by the exertion, but to see the moon low on the horizon while the sun rises on the mountains...It feels special somehow. Like a gift for taking time to work on myself.
And I am finding I do look forward to spending that time by myself. Who knew it'd be while exercising? I love my daughter, but she can be a lot of pre-pubescent angst and energy. It's hard to deal with her sometimes. I am really hoping that by learning to calm myself during class through measured (and/or deep and cleansing) breaths, it will also help me to be a better mother.
After all, as one of the instructors (a very sexy, rock star type) told me, "You don't have to force or push anything. By practicing yoga, everything will just fall into place, even in other aspects of your life."
Oh, I hope that is true.
Well, here's to positive thinking and positive being. Until my next entry, Lovelies....
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