To Misogyny and Beyond

I recently attended a local bar crawl.  Not really a frequent bar-goer, I have attended very few crawls.  Although I like dressing up in costumes, I generally find the huge crowds and extreme drunkenness too over-bearing for me to ever fully enjoy myself.  Unfortunately, this latest crawl was no different, with the exception that I came away from it with another reason to dislike them:  all the rampant misogyny!

Lest you write me off a man-hating, bra-burning, militant feminist, trust me, that is so not the case.    Oh no, I love men (much to my detriment sometimes).  I even love wearing bras, torturous though they can sometimes be.  While I am absolutely pro-woman (duh, I am one), I am certainly not militant about it.  I do not, however, understand when it became acceptable for anyone to think that just because a woman is wearing a costume she is inviting sexual advances?  Yes, it is true that many women wear next to nothing (a practice I have yet to understand due more to the potentially inclement weather than judgment) or very revealing garments.  Does this mean that they should be subjected to groping or lewd comments?  Hell, I wasn’t even wearing anything revealing (because I know how to dress for the weather) and a group of men surrounded me like jackals as I tried to get a drink at what is usually a pretty laid back bar.  Without even saying hi first, one of them asked if he could come home with me.  I responded, “You gonna clean my house?”  Alas, no "date" for me. 

When I later recounted this story to one of my coworkers (a very feisty, older woman), she said, “Well, what did you expect, honey?  Look at our Presidential Candidate.  Where do you think they’re learning it?”

Fast forward to what is now the day after the 2016 election.  Donald Trump, a man known for his belittling, homophobic, anti-feminist (etc., etc., etc.) remarks has just been elected the new president.

Not surprisingly, I have never been a Donald Trump supporter (as either a candidate or even a human), finding him to be arrogant, ego-maniacal and temperamental.  I do get that we’re all entitled to our opinions (or vote in this case).  But I’m not going to lie.  I am f*cking terrified that we have just set the progress of our country back so many years we can’t even count.  Never have I been so upset about the future of this country.  Never have I been at a loss as to what to tell my child that will help assuage her fears, because I don't know what to tell myself.  It may sound histrionic, but no, I can’t say to her with all certainty that Trump won’t start the first annual Hunger Games.  Or that we’re not headed down a post-apocalyptic path.  Or even that everything will be all right.  What the f*ck, America? 

We have all seen and heard so much hatred, especially during this last year, much of it from the President Elect’s own mouth.  How can we as citizens of this nation continue to work progressively toward unity and harmony—or hell, just for functionality’s sake—when this is what we will most likely see and hear on a regular basis?  It’s gonna take a whole hell of a lot of Strength, Love and Hope.  And maybe some pixie dust. Either way, we will need to continue to fight for our rights, to fly brave in the face of adversity and to demand a better world, perhaps even more now than ever.

Holy hell, it's going to be a long 4 years.  But hey, a lot can happen in 4 years... Guess I'll get back to wearing non-revealing costumes and fending off unwanted, lecherous advances in the meantime.  Sigh.