40 Days Till 40 (Day 23)

SLEEPLESS NIGHTS...AND SMELLY FISH

Man, I have been having some weird dreams lately.  I don’t know if they are brought on by stress, something I ate, too much creativity, physical inactivity or something else?  I’ve mentioned before that I have issues sleeping.  This is worse at certain times of the month, when the dreams are particularly scary or violent and I cannot seem to stay asleep for more than a few hours at a time.  Sometimes, though, it has nothing to do with hormones.  My restless sleep just is—and my dreams increase in weirdness.

Last night I dreamt that I was trying to release a fish back into its pond.  I have never been fishing before, so I didn’t know how to get the hook out of its mouth.  There were other fish too, but I wasn’t concerned about them.  A guy I dated a while ago was in the dream as well.  He kept trying to prevent me from releasing the poor fish, yanking it back out of the water.  I started getting more distraught, concerned that the fish was injured or would die.

Whenever I have a dream that seems fraught with symbolism, I like to look up the meaning.  Sometimes the interpretation of the symbolism makes sense.  Today it did not. 

Dreaming of a fish can mean anything from ideas and emotions to pregnancy (Let’s be honest though, unless it was Immaculate Conception, we can totally rule that last one out.).   Fish are generally considered lucky. Multiple fish can represent “plenty of fish in the sea”. 

The presence of an ex usually means unresolved emotions in a relationship (either about that particular ex or in a current one).  Since I am done with that ex and I am not currently in a relationship, I can probably rule that one out too. 

So then I start trying to think literally and it comes to me:  A friend of mine had contacted me a few days ago to tell me she was recently messaged (on “Plenty of Fish”, natch) by someone I had dated (yes, the one in the dream).  Apparently, he didn’t say much in the message other than a greeting, but the fact that he even did that really annoyed me.  No, not because of jealousy, but because he recently got married.   WHAT a wanker. 

My personal history with him aside (we were such a wrong fit), I am bothered that he, as a married man, was on a dating website at all.  Yes, some people use PoF for finding friends, but platonic is not generally a word to describe those friends (And yes, I do speak from experience.  Online dating hater and recipient of some awesome penis pics, remember?).  Plus, I felt sorry that my friend (who is pretty freaking awesome) hadn’t been contacted by an unattached someone. 

Don’t worry, I won’t get too ranty here, but let’s suffice it to say that cheating is a big no-no for me.  It is possible that the guy and his wife have an “open” marriage, but I doubt it. 

Jesus, I may never date again.  Lol. 

Until tomorrow, Lovelies….

Written 1/26/14